Mehrunes+Dagon
10 Of all the evil entities in the Elder Scrolls universe, Mehrunes Dagon is easily the most prolific. He really gets around, even for a Daedric prince. He meddled in Imperial Throne ascension, attacked the Battlespire and tried to destroy the Septims. Oh, also, he attempted to invade the mortal world by opening the gates to Oblivion and kicking everyone's ass with his four-armed self. So there's that. But I've just never found Dagon all that interesting. Maybe it's because he's spreading himself too thin. I mean, can't the guy just focus on one thing and do it really well? He's great at natural disasters, so maybe he should work on that for a while. After all, what kind of ancient netherworld-dwelling Daedric prince gets his ass kicked in his own house by an Argonian with a spear and a leather vest? Lame.Jyggalag
9 Jyggalag could really only be two things: the name of a weird god in a role-playing game or the internet handle of one of those dudes who hangs out on Insane Clown Posse message boards. Jyggie, as I like to call him, is a complicated god, as most of the Elder Scrolls deities are. He's technically one of the Daedric princes, which are like normal princes except they destroy worlds, wield magical items and generally make a mess of everything. Jyggalag wasn't much of a rockstar in the series until Oblivion's Shivering Isles expansion, in which it's revealed that he is actually Sheogorath, another Daedric prince. It's a long story. Oh, also, the Khajit (the kooky cat people of the Elder Scrolls universe) call him Skooma Cat. Yeah, that had nothing to do with anything, but I stuck it in there anyway. I'm writing an article about made-up gods in a game full of elves and lizard people, and you're going to judge me for the Skooma Cat thing? Fine, but you're reading it.Stendarr
8 I like Stendarr for a purely selfish reason: He digs humans. A lot of the gods in the Elder Scrolls universe are constantly hating on men because they meddle in things they shouldn't and make stupid decisions. But Stendarr is different. He was bros with Tiber Septim, who is pretty much the biggest badass of all time (and nearly a god in his own right) and protects human civilization despite its relative unpopularity among the rest of Cyrodil's unwashed masses. That makes Stendarr alright in my book. Sure, the annoying Imperial Legion soldiers never shut up about him, but you get used to it. And it's better that listening to elves talk, am I right?Clavicus+Vile
7 All religions need a trickster, except the boring ones (you know who you are). The mischevious Clavicus Vile has played at least a minor role in most of the Elder Scrolls games. Sometimes he appears as a rambunctious horned lad, and other times he pops up as a harmless looking dog. Clavicus Vile is special because he tricks mortals into giving up their eternal souls for magical trinkets and then snatches them back again without warning, which I find funny. If you followed the vampire quest line in Oblivion, you might remember that Clavicus was also responsible for bringing them into Cyrodil society. Vampires! Hilarious.Dibella
6 Hardcore Elder Scrolls lore nerds are probably reading this entry and shaking their sour-smelling, Cheeto-filled fists at the screen. "Dibella? You only had 10 spots and you chose Dibella? She's hardly even mentioned in many of the Elder Scrolls games! What about Kynareth or Meridia? Slow news day, IGN?" Calm down, I'll explain. Dibella might not be famous to us, but I guarantee everyone in Tamriel has a secret stash of Dibella offerings. She's known officially as the goddess of beauty, but one of her cults turns to her as a patron of the erotic arts. That's right -- she's a sex goddess. Wait, gross, that just made me think about elves having sex. Anyway, Dibella is hot, and I hope she gets her own quest line in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. As long as it's about sexy Nord girls in skimpy fur outfits. I took it too far, didn't I?Alduin
5 There's apparently some confusion over whether or not Alduin is simply the Nordic interpretation of Akatosh (more on him later), but I'm going to assume otherwise for the purpose of this extremely important list. Let the nerds sort it out in the comments section. Yes, Akatosh takes the form of a dragon when he's upset, and Alduin hangs out in Nord country, which is full of dragons. But that's where the similarity stops. For starters, Akatosh doesn't usually destroy worlds and bring about the apocalypse. Alduin is also much scarier than Akatosh, who just sort of hangs around until he's needed. Alduin -- get this -- once ate the ages of everyone in Skyrim until they were all six years old. That's just weird and unexpected; the kind of thing a scary god should do. Bravo, Alduin.Phynaster
4 Alright, so there's no way I'm going to get away with including Phynaster on this list, but I'm doing it anyway because no one will ever notice. Phynaster sounds like a member of the Black Eyed Peas, but he is actually a god worshipped in the Summerset Isles, which is full of high elves, but I won't hold that against it. Next to nothing is known about him, other than the fact that he (and I'm quoting the internet here), "taught the Altmer how to naturally live another hundred years by using a shorter walking stride." Altmer is another word for "high elves." This is important because it proves that elves aren't that special. They may live a long time, but not because they are deeply and magically awesome. It's because some guy taught them how to walk a certain way. Stupid elves!Ruptga
3 I like gods with names that are impossible to pronounce. Apparently so do the Redguard, who worship him as "Tall Papa" instead. Modeled on an aboriginal archetype, Tall Papa apparently taught the other gods how to persist from lifetime to lifetime using a "walkabout" technique. He also created a helper from the skin of dead worlds, which is weird and probably not very sanitary. While he was doing that, he probably should have been keeping an eye on the Redguard homeland of Yokuda, which was destroyed when it sank into the ocean. Too soon?Vivec
2 Vivec is a floating golden Dumner poet-demigod. And if you hadn't previously asked yourself why the hell you're reading this article, you certainly did when you read that sentence. You are welcome. Now, on with the lesson. Vivec is seen as a benevolent protector by his worshippers. They conveniently ignore the fact that he may also be a murdering weirdo. But he writes sweet poems and taught the Dark Elves how to breathe underwater, so I can see how they overlook the bad bits. Great, just what we need: elves who can breathe underwater. It's gross enough when your leg brushes up against a mud crab as you cross a river. Now we have to worry about elves swimming around down there? Yuck. Thanks for nothing, Vivec. Still, he's gold and he floats. Awesome. Sure, he's not technically a god anymore (it's complicated), but who's keeping track?Akatosh
1 Ah, Akatosh. If the power of a god derives in part from his sheer age, then Aka is the biggest and baddest of them all. How many gods can say they formed in "the Beginning Place"? Yeah, that's what I thought. The goofy necklace that Patrick Stewart wears at the beginning of Oblivion? That's the Amulet of Kings, and its destruction summoned Akatosh in the form of an enormous flaming dragon. It was Akatosh who defeated Mehrunes Dagon and saved Cyrodil from being sucked into Oblivion. Aka is one of only two deities to appear in every single religion in Tamriel; even most of the dirty elves acknowledge him!This is the part where I would normally ask you what your favorite Elder Scrolls gods are, but there are probably only 500 people in the world who have even thought about this, and half of them work at Bethesda.
Shout out to The Unofficial Elder Scrolls Pages for providing more information about random crap than the internet has any right to access.
See Also
Akatosh